Abiola had worked under Mr Etim for nineteen months before he asked her to falsify anything. Those nineteen months had been hard enough.
She was the senior accounts officer at the Uyo branch of a building-materials distributor, having moved from Ibadan when she married. Mr Etim was the branch manager, a man in his fifties with a brilliant memory for customers and no apparent memory for courtesy. He shouted at staff across the open office. He sent messages at a quarter to eleven at night demanding figures by seven the next morning. He had refused her leave twice, once in the week of her sister’s wedding. And at a review meeting with visitors from head office, he had presented the reconciliation she had spent three weekends completing as though he had done it himself, while she sat at the end of the table taking minutes.
She prayed about him constantly, usually some version of “Lord, either change this man or move me.” Neither happened. She was not proud of everything she did in those months. Once, after a particularly humiliating morning, she typed a long and very funny description of him into the staff WhatsApp group, and spent the evening watching the laughing faces multiply under it with a sick feeling in her stomach.
Then, at the end of a quarter, Mr Etim called her into his office and closed the door. Sales had been strong, mostly in cash. Head office wanted the branch’s figures to look a particular way, he said, and the tax people would never look closely at a branch in Uyo. She was to record a portion of the cash sales as returned goods, reduce the VAT figure accordingly and reissue some invoices with earlier dates.
Abiola said she was not comfortable doing that. Mr Etim leaned back in his chair. “Madam, you are paid to do what I tell you. Or do you want to go back to Ibadan?”
That evening she called a friend from church for advice. The friend was sympathetic, but her counsel was simple. “Just do it, my sister. It is his signature, not yours. The Bible says servants should obey their masters. God will see your heart.”
Abiola put the phone down feeling more confused than before. She had been trying for nineteen months to honour a difficult boss. Was this what honouring him required?
Two tests in one office
A difficult supervisor tests us in two different ways, and much confusion comes from mixing them up.
The first is a test of patience. The boss is rude, unfair, inconsistent or unpleasant, but he is not asking you to do anything wrong. He takes credit for your work. He forgets your birthday and remembers your mistakes. He calls at night. These things are painful and sometimes unjust, and you may rightly seek to address some of them. But they do not require you to sin. The question they put to you is whether you will keep working well, speaking respectfully and refusing bitterness while you are treated badly.
The second is a test of conviction. Here the boss is asking you to do something that is actually wrong: to lie to a customer, falsify a return, pad an invoice, hide a safety failure, “settle” an official or treat a colleague unjustly. The question here is different. It is not whether you can endure, but whether you will obey God when obeying your manager would mean disobeying Him.
And there is a third situation that must be named separately, because it is not mainly a test at all. When a boss harasses you sexually, threatens you, assaults you, or puts your physical safety at risk, you are not being called to quiet endurance. You are being called to get safe and seek help. We will come to that.
PunchlineAbiola’s friend applied the answer for the first test to the second. That is exactly what Scripture does not do.
Suffering wrongfully
Peter’s first letter contains the strongest New Testament teaching on enduring a harsh master:
Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward. For this is thankworthy, if a man for conscience toward God endure grief, suffering wrongfully. For what glory is it , if, when ye be buffeted for your faults, ye shall take it patiently? but if, when ye do well, and suffer for it , ye take it patiently, this is acceptable with God. For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps: Who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth: Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously.
Peter is writing to household servants, many of whom had no legal rights and no way out. Neither he nor Paul was approving slavery as an institution; the gospel they preached would, over time, undermine its foundations. Peter is giving people with very little power a way to live with dignity and faith inside a situation they could not change. A modern employee, with a contract, legal protections and the freedom to resign, should apply his words with that difference in mind.
Look at how honest Peter is about the masters. Some are “good and gentle.” Others are “froward.” The Greek word is skolios, meaning crooked or twisted, the word from which we get scoliosis. Peter does not pretend that every boss is reasonable. Some are bent.
What does he ask of the servant under such a master? First, that he endure “for conscience toward God.” The motive is not fear of the master. It is awareness of God. The servant is conscious of God’s presence even while he is being treated unjustly.
Second, Peter distinguishes between two kinds of suffering. If you are punished because you have actually done wrong, there is no special credit in taking it quietly. But “if, when ye do well, and suffer for it, ye take it patiently, this is acceptable with God.” The suffering Peter has in mind is suffering for doing right.
And third, he points to Christ. “Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example.” The word example is a lovely one. It described the letters a teacher wrote at the top of a child’s slate for the child to trace underneath. Jesus has written the pattern; we trace it. And the pattern is very specific: “when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously.”
Notice what this excludes. It excludes retaliation. It excludes the cutting reply, the sabotage, the quiet slowing down of work to punish the manager, and, yes, the funny paragraph in the staff WhatsApp group. Abiola recognised herself immediately.
But notice what it does not say. It does not say that Christ did whatever He was told by those who mistreated Him. He stood silent before Pilate, but He had spent three years refusing the demands of religious authorities who wanted Him to stop healing on the Sabbath and stop eating with sinners. Jesus never sinned in order to keep the peace. Committing yourself to the righteous Judge is a refusal to take revenge. It is never a licence for someone else to make you sin.
NuggetFollowing Christ’s example means refusing to retaliate against a harsh boss. It never means doing wrong because a harsh boss demands it.
Working well for an unfair employer
Before we come to the limits of submission, we should stay a little longer with the test of patience, because most difficult bosses never ask us to sin. They are simply hard to work for.
Jacob knew that experience for twenty years. He worked for his uncle Laban, a man who deceived him on his wedding night and kept shifting the terms of their agreement. Near the end, Jacob told his wives, “with all my power I have served your father. And your father hath deceived me, and changed my wages ten times; but God suffered him not to hurt me” (Genesis 31:6-7). He had worked through drought by day and frost by night, while “my sleep departed from mine eyes” (Genesis 31:40).
Notice two things. Jacob kept working “with all my power,” even for a man who cheated him. Laban himself admitted, “I have learned by experience that the LORD hath blessed me for thy sake” (Genesis 30:27). And Jacob recognised that God was watching over him through it all: “God hath seen mine affliction and the labour of my hands” (Genesis 31:42). The unfair employer was not the final authority over his life.
That is a great comfort when your appraisal is written by someone who does not like you. Your manager’s opinion matters, and you should do what you can to earn a fair one. But it is not the verdict on your worth. You are a child of God before you are anyone’s employee, and your Father sees the labour of your hands even when your supervisor does not.
Paul adds something we easily forget. He urges that prayers be made “For kings, and for all that are in authority” (1 Timothy 2:2). Your boss is included. Pray for him by name. Pray for his family, his health and his pressures, which may be greater than you know. Mr Etim, it later emerged, was being squeezed hard by head office for numbers. That did not excuse his behaviour, but it helped Abiola see him as a man and not only as a problem. It is difficult to keep hating someone you are honestly praying for.
We ought to obey God rather than men
The man who wrote those words about patient submission is the same man who once stood before the highest religious court in Jerusalem and refused a direct order:
And when they had brought them, they set them before the council: and the high priest asked them, Saying, Did not we straitly command you that ye should not teach in this name? and, behold, ye have filled Jerusalem with your doctrine, and intend to bring this man’s blood upon us. Then Peter and the other apostles answered and said, We ought to obey God rather than men.
The Sanhedrin had already arrested Peter and John once, threatened them and forbidden them to preach in Jesus’ name (Acts 4:18-21). Now the apostles had been arrested again. Peter had every reason to respect that council. It was the established authority of his own people. And yet when its command contradicted God’s command, his answer was immediate and unambiguous: “We ought to obey God rather than men.”
Look at how he says it. He does not insult the council. He does not organise a riot. He explains, publicly and calmly, why he cannot comply. And when the council has the apostles beaten and releases them, they leave “rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer shame for his name” (Acts 5:41). They refused to sin, and they accepted the cost of refusing.
This is how Scripture holds the two truths together. Submission to authority is the normal posture of the believer. Obedience to God is the absolute one. When the two conflict, the absolute one wins.
The principle is much older than Peter. In Egypt, Pharaoh gave a direct order to the Hebrew midwives:
And the king of Egypt spake to the Hebrew midwives, of which the name of the one was Shiphrah, and the name of the other Puah: And he said, When ye do the office of a midwife to the Hebrew women, and see them upon the stools; if it be a son, then ye shall kill him: but if it be a daughter, then she shall live. But the midwives feared God, and did not as the king of Egypt commanded them, but saved the men children alive.
“But the midwives feared God, and did not as the king of Egypt commanded them.” These were two women in a hard profession, answerable to the most powerful ruler on earth. The command came from the very top. And they refused, because they feared God more than they feared Pharaoh. Scripture adds that “God dealt well with the midwives” (Exodus 1:20).
The obedience texts in Scripture were never designed to make believers complicit in wrongdoing. “Servants, obey your masters” sits inside a Bible that also says, “Thou shalt not bear false witness” and “Thou shalt not steal.” No master, manager, pastor or government can cancel God’s commandments by issuing an instruction. When Abiola’s friend said, “It is his signature, not yours,” she missed the fact that Abiola would be the one preparing the false figures. The lie would be in her hands.
As much as lieth in you
Saying no to wrongdoing does not mean declaring war on your boss. Paul gives a crucial balance in Romans:
Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head. Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
“Provide things honest in the sight of all men.” The word honest again means honourable, what is seen to be right. Your conduct should be visibly good.
Then comes the key verse: “If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.” There are two qualifications, and both are realistic. If it be possible: Paul admits that peace is not always possible. Some people will not be at peace with you whatever you do. As much as lieth in you: you are responsible for your side. You cannot control Mr Etim’s temper. You can control whether you add fuel to it.
Then Paul forbids revenge: “avenge not yourselves.” He does not say that wrong will go unaddressed. He says, “Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.” God is the one who settles accounts.
This raises a question that troubles many believers. If I report my boss’s wrongdoing, am I taking revenge? Paul’s very next paragraph answers it. He goes on to describe the governing authority as “the minister of God to thee for good... a revenger to execute wrath upon him that doeth evil” (Romans 13:4). God’s way of addressing wrongdoing includes lawful, proper structures. Reporting fraud through the correct channel is not personal vengeance. It is handing the matter to the authorities God has placed there for exactly that purpose.
The difference lies in the heart and the method. Revenge wants the other person to suffer. It spreads stories, humiliates, sabotages and enjoys the fall. Proper reporting wants the wrong to stop. It tells the truth to the right person, in the right way, and leaves the outcome there.
And alongside all of this sits Paul’s remarkable instruction: “if thine enemy hunger, feed him.” Overcome evil with good. The believer under a difficult boss is not simply surviving. He is looking for ways to do the man good.
Disagreeing without dishonour
Scripture gives us one of its most moving pictures of respectful disagreement in the story of David and Saul. Saul was the king and David’s employer, in a sense. He was also jealous, unstable and repeatedly trying to kill him. In a cave at En-gedi, David had the chance to end it. He cut off a corner of Saul’s robe instead, and then went out after him:
Behold, this day thine eyes have seen how that the LORD had delivered thee to day into mine hand in the cave: and some bade me kill thee: but mine eye spared thee; and I said, I will not put forth mine hand against my lord; for he is the LORD’s anointed. Moreover, my father, see, yea, see the skirt of thy robe in my hand: for in that I cut off the skirt of thy robe, and killed thee not, know thou and see that there is neither evil nor transgression in mine hand, and I have not sinned against thee; yet thou huntest my soul to take it. The LORD judge between me and thee, and the LORD avenge me of thee: but mine hand shall not be upon thee.
Look at everything David does here. He bows. He calls Saul “my lord” and even “my father.” He does not pretend things are fine: he tells Saul plainly, “thou huntest my soul to take it.” He offers evidence, the piece of robe in his hand. He states his own innocence. And he leaves judgement to God: “The LORD judge between me and thee... but mine hand shall not be upon thee.”
That is the shape of respectful disagreement. Honour the person’s office. Speak plainly about what is wrong. Bring evidence rather than accusation. Refuse to take matters into your own hands. And entrust the outcome to God.
The book of Ecclesiastes adds some practical wisdom: “If the spirit of the ruler rise up against thee, leave not thy place; for yielding pacifieth great offences” (Ecclesiastes 10:4). When a boss is angry, do not storm out or answer in kind. A calm response often lowers the temperature. “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). And over time, “By long forbearing is a prince persuaded, and a soft tongue breaketh the bone” (Proverbs 25:15). Patient, gentle persistence can move even very hard people.
In practice, that might sound like this: “Sir, I want to support the branch and I know the figures matter. But I am not able to record these sales as returns, because it would not be true and it would put both of us at risk. I can prepare an accurate return today and help you explain the numbers to head office.” Short, respectful, firm, with an offer of help. Put it in writing afterwards, without drama, so that there is a clear record of what was asked and what you said.
Reporting wrongdoing through proper channels
Many Nigerian workplaces have a strong culture of loyalty to the “oga,” and there is something good in that. Loyalty is a virtue. But loyalty to a person can never require covering up fraud, theft or danger. Paul says, “have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them” (Ephesians 5:11).
Paul himself was willing to use the legal protections available to him. When Roman soldiers were about to scourge him without trial, he asked, “Is it lawful for you to scourge a man that is a Roman, and uncondemned?” (Acts 22:25). He did not consider it unspiritual to invoke the rules. Using proper procedures is part of living wisely under authority.
That means learning what channels your organisation has: a compliance officer, an internal audit department, a whistleblowing line, a senior manager above your supervisor, a board, a regulator. It means keeping accurate notes of dates, instructions and conversations. It means telling the truth without exaggeration, and avoiding gossip with colleagues while the matter is being addressed. And it may mean taking advice from a lawyer, a trusted mentor or, where relevant, a professional body before you act.
It also means counting the cost honestly. Some reports are welcomed. Others lead to retaliation, isolation or the loss of a job. Wise believers prepare for that possibility: they keep their CV current, they save where they can, they build relationships outside a single employer, and they pray. Your provision does not depend on Mr Etim, even when he speaks as though it does.
When it becomes unsafe
Some readers are not dealing with a rude or dishonest boss. They are dealing with something worse. A supervisor who demands sexual favours, or makes your job depend on tolerating his touch or his messages. A manager who threatens violence. A workplace where you are forced to work with dangerous equipment without protection, or locked in, or not allowed to leave. Please hear this clearly: 1 Peter 2 does not require you to endure that.
When Saul hurled a javelin at David, “David fled, and escaped that night” (1 Samuel 19:10). He went on honouring Saul’s office for years, but he did not stay within reach of the spear. When Paul’s life was threatened in Damascus, the disciples “let him down by the wall in a basket” (Acts 9:25). Fleeing danger is not a failure of faith or of submission.
If you are being harassed or abused at work, take steps to get safe. Tell someone you trust. Keep messages and records. Report the behaviour to Human Resources, to a senior manager above the person, or to the appropriate external authority, including the police where a crime has been committed. Seek legal advice if you can, and support from organisations that help people in your situation. If you need to leave the job, leaving is not sinful, and it is not weakness. No one should be told, by a manager or by a church, that abuse must be endured in the name of submission. That is a misuse of Scripture, and it causes deep harm.
PunchlineAnd to any believer who is a manager: if someone brings you a report like this, take it seriously, protect the person who reported it and act.
Abiola did not prepare the false figures. She did not sleep much either.
The next morning she knocked on Mr Etim’s door and said, more or less, the words written above. He shouted. He told her she was naive and that she did not understand how business worked in this country. She said she was sorry he was angry, and that she would prepare the accurate return by the afternoon. Then she went back to her desk and wrote him a polite email confirming the conversation. Her hands were shaking as she typed.
Two days later, after much prayer and a long talk with her husband, she contacted the group financial controller in Lagos through the company’s whistleblowing procedure. She stuck to the facts. Head office opened a review. It found similar adjustments in two other branches, and Mr Etim received a formal written warning. Abiola’s reporting line was moved to the regional finance manager.
She did not get a happy ending in the usual sense. Mr Etim did not apologise. For months he barely greeted her. She kept greeting him every morning anyway. She deleted the old WhatsApp message and apologised to the group for posting it. When his wife was admitted to hospital that year, Abiola contributed to the staff collection and sent him a short message saying she was praying. He did not reply.
The following year, tax auditors visited every branch in the region. Two branches faced heavy penalties. Uyo’s records were clean. Abiola told me that as the auditors were leaving, Mr Etim walked past her desk and said, without stopping, “That your stubbornness has saved this branch.” It was the closest thing to thanks she ever received.
“I used to think honouring him meant doing whatever he said,” she told me. “Now I know it meant refusing to lie, refusing to fight dirty, and still wishing him well.”
That is the narrow path through difficult leadership. Be patient with what is merely hard. Refuse what is wrong. Get safe from what is dangerous. And through it all, keep committing yourself to Him who judges righteously.
Teaching Companion
For Reflection
- Is the difficulty you face with your supervisor mainly a test of patience, a test of conviction, or a matter of safety? How does naming it change your response?
- Where have you been tempted to retaliate against a difficult boss in small ways, through gossip, sabotage or a cutting reply?
- Has anyone ever used an obedience text to pressure you into doing something wrong? How would you answer that now?
- What would a respectful but firm refusal sound like in your own workplace?
- What proper channels exist in your organisation for reporting wrongdoing or harassment? Do you know how to use them?
This Week
Write out, in two or three sentences, how you would respectfully decline if your manager asked you to do something dishonest, and keep it somewhere you can find it. Then find out this week what reporting procedures your workplace has, and where you would go for help if you were ever harassed or unsafe. Finally, choose one practical way to do your difficult boss some good, and do it quietly.
A Prayer
Lord Jesus, when You were reviled, You did not revile again, and You committed Yourself to the Father who judges righteously. Teach me to follow Your steps at work. Give me patience with what is merely hard, and courage to refuse what is wrong. Guard my tongue from gossip and my heart from revenge. Help me to obey God rather than men when the two cannot both be obeyed, and to do it with respect and without fear. Protect those who are unsafe in their workplaces and lead them to help. And bless the people I find difficult to work under. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Truth received brings freedom. Truth believed establishes the heart.
Scripture quotations are from the King James Version. · Illustrations using first names only are composites unless stated otherwise.